Lessons
We Learned From Terri Schiavo
By Dr. Mel Glazer
WLet's talk
about Terry Schiavo, since her death
illustrated for me many aspects of grief
and hope. Who among us was not moved
by the drama of her last days? I know
I was. Her death was not the way I would
want my own death to be. When my time
comes, I want no heroic measures, since
for me they simply postpone the inevitable.
And watching the family feud that took
place between her husband and her parents,
with all the tension and the anger, saddened
me terribly. Peace should be the last
emotion Terry felt, but who knows if
she heard only the angry words passed
between those she loved. No one should
have to die as she did.
What a shame.
At the same time, look at the two different
approaches to grief
presented to us, one by her husband Michael
and the other by her parents the Schindlers.
Michael was clearly ready to "lay
her gently down," he was prepared
to move on with his new life and to "begin
again" with his fiancee and two
young children. Some say he was ready
a bit too soon, but I disagree. Grief
takes as long as it needs, there is no
clock for the soul. Her parents, on the
other hand, were clearly unable to give
her up yet. It is understandable that
parents would be so protective of their
kids, and I don't know what I would do
if, God forbid, one of my own kids was
in a similar state.
I am not
judging, just pointing out the differences
in
style and approach
in this wrenching drama. For Terri's
parents, despite how they may feel
now, they must know that there is still
hope
for them. There is a new future which
they will soon help create; there will
be new challenges for them and their
family which they cannot yet know.
When you are grieving, you often lose
sight
of the future, because the present
is so draining. But no matter what has
been
taken from you there is hope. They
still have each other and they still
have a
life in front of them. I certainly
pray that they will find healing and
consolation,
and that Terri's memories will bring
them peace.
Dr.
Mel Glazer • Your Grief Matters
1.877.532-4246 (1.877.LECHAIM)
mel@yourgriefmatters.com •
www.yourgriefmatters.com
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© Dr. Mel Glazer, 2005. All rights reserved.
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